Babies are so cute. They are the most beautiful thing that comes from pregnancy and childbirth. Most days I am in awe of my body for incubating two whole humans and even pushing them out whole and healthy. I mean how incredible is that. Participating in making sure human life doesn’t become extinct. That being said, my body confidence has gotten really low after baby number 2. Looking myself in the mirror is quite a challenge.
Let’s start from the beginning. Finding out that I was pregnant was at first shocking, then the happiness came. After absorbing the news, swollen feet came, then the growing womb, the round face and worse of, the recurring yeast infection. Oh the infection, it was from hell and there is nothing my doctor could do except we wait for my hormones to stabilize. Nine months later, our most beautiful princess was born. Check it out here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lykFjGt_bOc&t=259s. What followed was pure joy and then a roller coaster of body changes.
For starters, I experienced night sweats. I am freaking 30, why did I go through menopausal symptoms? The next shock was my cracked nipples, AGAIN!! 8 months later they still hurt. All this I knew for sure would pass. I was attentive to all these changes my body was undergoing. Needless to say, I had gained 20 kgs during the pregnancy so I definitely looked fat. It’s all lost now! In fact about two weeks post partum one of my cousins was keen to remind me of how fat I looked. She went ahead to try to relate with her one year postpartum body. This left me insecure. Being on social media did not help the situation.
A month later I was required to do core exercises since my pubic bone had separated and walking was incredibly painful. Sharing this was also a bad idea since there were those who felt entitled enough to be my personal trainer. Let’s not forget I still looked pregnant. I still do, sometimes. The body I carried so confidently has changed to almost a point of no return. However, we take a day at a time.
6 months later, I started running and working out at home. I am in a better space to do this now. Two months into it, and the loose skin is still evident. My breasts look sad especially by the end of the day. It is okay. I am not as confident as I used to be but I am healthy and fit enough to start a fitness routine. I am so grateful to so many ladies who post their workout routines on Instagram for inspiring me. Growing up, running was a form of punishment. This is an activity that never crossed my mind. Thanks to a mum friend, I run up to 12km a week,
There are days I feel so beautiful in this body. I embrace my marks. They are a sign of strength. Body shaming is not cool, just carry your damn body with pride. Work out if you feel ready, otherwise enjoy every day of motherhood. I have made my peace with food, running, sad boobs and stretched stomach, and we are all having a ball here.