WILD THOUGHTS

I am in a rant mood. Wild thoughts all over.  Do you remember when I said that I did not feel beautiful enough in thís vlog? Am I 16 or what? Anyway, today was something else. I woke up full of life. Played with Bernie as usual. His unfailing smile was there to brighten my day. As a matter of fact, babe left us sleeping this morning, which means I got more rest than usual. I dropped Bernie at the play school and he wished me a lovely day. Soon after, I hit the road to catch a bus to the dentist.

No sooner had I boarded than my mom called. By the way I try my best to always pick up her calls. We got so deep into girl talk that I forgot I hadn’t brought my bus card. This forced me to part with freaking 48kr. Do you know what 48 kr can do? A lot. It could buy us dinner. My friend’s visit recently opened my eyes to how expensive life is here. You know those times she had to multiply the cost of everything by 15 which is the value of Kroner to Kenya shillings.

Anyway, this is not some long post. My appointment with the dentist was painful as usual not to mention it leaving me broke. Lately  I have been in this pity party that is very annoying. You know, when you focus on all the wrong things in your life. The increasing weight, my wide smile, joblessness, even this stupid pimple on my cheek. I felt sad for even allowing these thoughts. I figured that I needed to get to the bottom of this. My parents always told us that we couldn’t change our situation unless we knew the root cause.

So after my appointment I took sometime off from my everyday internet jobs. That is when it all downed on me. I have stalled on my work out. The endorphin has to be released to get rid of my pimple and even the excess weight. We also embarked on late night ice cream parties in the name of a friend on vacation and we seem to be still lost in it. Needless to say my food portions have increased, my weekly blogs diminished, my bible plans filled with dust. I decided to shake all the negative energy away and make the best out of my time.  I remembered there are people who read my articles and are tired of waiting. More so, I have met incredible people through this channel.

Whenever I break my usual routine, there is confusion and sadness. I end up in comfort eating and pity partying. Most times, the simplest things are the cause of stress and even depression. When you overthink every petty issue in your life.

It is my belief that my sole purpose of existence is to make a difference in whatever I do. To do the good I want to see in the world. Sitting and whining does not seem to fulfill that purpose. It is so much joy when I receive a text about how one of these articles changed someone else life or even situation. I don’t mind some bit of cash. However, it is not a priority if it is for selfish purposes.

In conclusion, this is what we were up to with Nancy during her visit.

 

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